The Last Stand of Don Vincenzo

Writer: Grant Morrison
Artist: Simone Bianchi
Colourist: Dave Stewart
Letterer: Rob Leigh

Featured Characters:

			Vanguard
	Crazyface		Don Vincenzo
	Strato		Gloriana Tenebrae
	Sir Galahad		I, Spyder
	Neh-Buh-Loh

This issue is reprinted in:

Seven Soldiers Vol. 2

Noteworthy Items:

by DAVID BIRD

pp 01-03: We start off in Gloriana’s throne room. She’s gloating and why shouldn’t she be? In short order she has recovered the sword Caliburn Ex Calibur and she has located her missing cauldron. There is every reason to expect its quick return. Note who is at her left – that is, sinister – hand! Yes, it’s I, Spyder. While she waits for her cauldron she arranges a little entertainment. She is setting the perfect knight against the last knight. As we saw in issue three, Galahad survived the fall of Camelot, but only after a fashion. In the ten thousand years since his capture he has been reduced to a mockery of his former self.

Actually, given his chalky complexion it’s worth considering that, maybe, he isn’t himself. In issue two Mood 7 Mind Destroyer told Justin that they used the dead of Camelot as slaves. Maybe this is Grundy Galahad. If he is, though, he is far from a shambling zombie. The image of his attack at the top of page two, with its flailing motion lines make it appear as though he has six arms, and reminds me of images of Kali, a Hindu goddess associated with violence. Justin’s defence against the attack amounts to trying to get Galahad to snap out of it by pleading “It’s me.” We’ll learn the nature of their relationship before this issue ends. Galahad has two swords and quickly shatters Justin’s. The broken sword looks like Aurakles’, but that’s unlikely. Gloriana isn’t going to hand it over to the whelp, just for entertainment’s sake. Plus, it broke. It’s not the sort of relic to survive millennia just to break.

Throughout the fight the Queen continues her gloating, telling her archer that the current generation of man is nothing compared to what it once was and that that generation was nothing compared to their might. I, Spyder relies, “A great day, M’lady. For some.” It’s a comment just stuffed with implications, but we don’t technically know that yet.

pp 04-05: Back at his palatial estate Vincenzo is returning to life and sealing his death. He had been shot through the neck by an arrow laced with a biotracker. If the target were to return to life, the tracker will be activated and his location known to the Sheeda. By implication, so will the location of the life restoring cauldron. That puts this issue ahead of Zatanna #3, where the Undying Don was found dead. Finally and completely. In a display of machismo, he rips the arrow out through his neck. He is surrounded by four bodyguards, who seem to be soaking up the ambiance of the resurrection. Crazyface later refers to them as the Four Tops, but this is their only appearance and we don’t find out whether that’s a nick name, a bit of sarcasm, or if they’re really called that.

pp 06-09: Meanwhile Justin continues to take a beating, until the Queen literarily smells the “blood of a womb.” So… now she’s a vampire? I really thought this point was a let down. Galahad is taking Justin apart. He could have reasonably ripped the armour off and revealed her true gender without the Queen’s olfactory prowess. It reminded me of a line in the SF movie Pitch Black where Vin Diesel’s character reveals the hidden gender of another character pretty much the same way. That was a great film, by the way, but a silly line.

So Justin is Justina. Of course, we knew that. We’ve read all this before. But it does explain the sometimes androgynous look to the character. Only sometimes androgynous, however. Bianchi has given us some great art for this series, but his attempts to hide Justin’s gender have been inconsistent to put it mildly. And this issue provides some of his worse art to date. It looks rushed and the murky colouring doesn’t help.

At this point, the Queen’s entertainments are stopped by an important message. The little Sheeda is speaking in English, technically, but the alphabet used is called Ogham, an ancient Celtic alphabet. A couple of guys , with more patience than I have, produced a translation for this line (and the other three occurrences of Ogham in the issue). He tells the Queen, "I bring news of your husband, mistress." Melmoth is her husband! The fight ends and she retires, telling Galahad to “Break her to slavery in the customary fashion. Make her beg to love me.” Machiavelli wrote that it was better for a leader to be feared than loved, because the person seeking love is at the mercy of the person giving love, while the person creating the fear holds the other at their mercy. While this is happening Justin displays her single-mindedness, reaching for the two swords Galahad put down when he started to beat her.

pp 10-15: Crazyface is briefing his Don. It’s been five hours since he died and most of their men are dead. He thinks its Silencio, a connection to Klarion and, as we’ll see, Frankenstein. Vincenzo knows better. What’s happening is mythological, “These are the end times. This is where we make our peace with who we are and go down fighting.” It’s death and glory time.

Outside Sheeda soldiers are working to break their way in. The translations of their dialogue are, perhaps, better taken with a grain of salt. "In Heaven there is no beer." "Which is why we drink it here." And later, "Always after me lucky charms." Once again they are carrying green lanterns, but they don’t seem to bear any relation to the DCU forebears.

Suddenly, Vincenzo, Crazyface, Strato, and the Four Tops charge out at the Sheeda. Who didn’t see this and flash back to the last stand at Helm’s Deep? They quickly take out the giant spider and Vicenzo’s angered to see it’s a robot. Personally, I’d rather it be a robot than an actual giant spider, but the story has been far from clear about these creatures. Real or mechanical? Misty seemed to think it was real and a toy. Did she see it through a child’s eyes? Traditionally, a child’s love could make a toy real. More likely the Sheeda don’t draw a sharp disctinction between real and mechanical. Neh-Buh-Loh delivers his death blow, but the Don isn’t ready to go yet. He has some “special bullets” in store for the Nebula Man. He does it for Mo Colley. Who? That will be explained in Manhattan Guardian #4. He orders Strato to cut out his globular clusters. He knows what Neh-Buh-Loh is. How isn’t’ explained.

pp 16-18: Things quickly wrap up. Justin pleads with Galahad, but sees there is nothing of him left and dispatches him with his own swords. She makes for the Queen. The red she mentions is blood, the ravens are carrion eaters. Death also finds the Undying Don. He sees the Revolving Castle and a place for himself in myth. This scene is extremely unclear. We’ve already seen a version of it in Zatanna #3. Here Vanguard is lying in a pool of his own blood. There he’s on his feet (though being abused by the Sheeda). Okay, he’s already shown remarkable powers of recuperation, but the inconsistencies get worse. The Huntsman is gloating over the dead Don. He has the cauldron. According to Zatanna #3, he killed Vincenzo, got the pot, sent Zee and Misty fleeing for their lives, and now… he’s back outside. Why would he be speaking to a lifeless body? Finally, we go back ten thousand years and see a third death. Camelot’s.

pp 19-22: Galahad is making use of Merlin’s equipment, there is no sign of the wizard, nor any other mention of him. He tells his squire Justin that “the great day of doom is here.” An older meaning of doom is judgement. It’s Judgement Day. He tells the boy that he has discovered what the Sheeda are by using Merlin’s “seeing stones”. The ability to see into the future is widely acknowledged as one of Merlin’s talents. As Galahad prepares to leave a horse arrives with the body of Tristan. Tristan was a member of the Round (or Broken) Table and the male lead in one of the most famous love stories. Seven score, one hundred and forty, horses and riders have been slain. He tells Justin that he must answer the call to glory. Not victory. Like Vincenzo he expects to die. And like Vincenzo’s death, things are a little unclear. He asks, perhaps rhetorically, if all the knights have fallen, after saying that seven score have. Is he working this out as he goes along? It just doesn’t flow naturally.

As a last request Justin asks to be knighted. Galahad says its madness, but he also finds hope in the squire’s courage. He dubs him Justin, the Shining Knight. Left with Vanguard, who, I assume, is the horse that brought the body Tristan, Justin says that Galahad will never know his love. Apparently he doesn’t have to explain his disguise to the horse. They fly off to the Revolving Castle and the beginning of our tale.

Thus endeth the first mini. I went into it without any expectations and, except for the art in this last issue, it was a superior story all the way through. Of the four Soldiers we have been introduced to, Justin is easily the most heroic. In spite of an attempt plague her with guilt, which she successfully fought off, her focus has been clear and unwavering. She is the last knight of Camelot and she seeks to revenge herself on its destroyer. We are promised that one of the Soldiers must die. Given the narrowness of her purpose, I don’t think Justin will avoid her death as long as she can accomplish her aim.

BONUS!

	Page 8: "I bring news of your husband mistress."
	Page 11 Part 1: "In Heaven there is no beer."
	Page 11 Part 2: "Which is why we drink it here."
	Page 13: "Always after me lucky charms."